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I saw on your Twitter, it's like relationship clips from your show, this and that,
and then ranting about the Packers.
What's up you guys? I'm Rachel Demita and welcome to the Courtside Club.
Today I'm joined by TV personality, Bachelor star, and host of the Vile Files, Nick Vial.
Welcome to the Courtside Club.
Thanks for having me.
We've been meaning to do this for a while. I'm glad it worked out in our business schedule.
You know, we're here now, you know.
It did. And I know that you're a sports fan, TV personality.
A lot of people know you from The Bachelor.
Three seasons there.
Well, one season Bachelor, two seasons.
No, technically four iterations.
I did two seasons of The Bachelorette, one of Paradise, and then I was The Bachelor.
Oh, Paradise. So that is actually the one that I've tapped into the most, I will say.
Definitely the best. I feel like those were my best.
Yeah. That was my best work, I like to say.
It is fun. I had a really good time.
If I could do it again without the TVs and the expectation to like fall in love or meet someone,
but like just to go there with friends, great experience. I would do it again.
Everybody wants a paid vacation.
It's summer camp for adults. It's fun. Yeah.
So there's a new season out right now. It's very new, right?
I've had one episode.
What would be your advice?
What would be your advice for the new Bachelor? Zach?
Zach. My advice to him, if he like reached out today, you know, I would give him advice more
around managing his mental health and expectations as the show airs, because there's like two phases
that the lead has to deal with, which is filming the show, which is mentally and physically
exhausting. It's a nightmare. Like, you know, not to sound like it's a very amazing opportunity
that opens up a lot of doors and gives you incredible access. But like,
it takes very much a toll physically and mentally when you're filming it. It's nonstop. It's,
you know, 16, 18 hour days. It's, it's, it's a lot.
And how long is it? Go for?
Non-pandemic when they were like not traveling and locked in a hotel. It's,
I think it's like about eight and a half, nine weeks.
Yeah. It's a long time.
And so, but then like once you're done filming, which is like a really nice relief,
then there's the whole, like while it's airing, is also another challenge. Like,
I don't know what Zach's situation is, whether he's in a relationship or not, or, you know,
engaged or not, but it's a very complicated world, uh, of, of kind of navigating, um,
your role as the lead or the bachelor, the bachelorette and trying to, um, start this
new relationship if you're in one, you know, which, uh, it's one thing to, you know, be on
the show and, and, and be fighting for the affection of one person while you're going on
And watching other people date the same person you're catching feelings for. But like once
that relationship is solidified down to one person and usually with an engagement there,
the expectations can drastically change.
And then that person starts watching you make out with other people and hear you say things
to them that was like, well, that's weird. You know, like you watch an episode and, and, and
it might be episode four and the person you're now engaged to, you're watching them on a date,
Oh, like no one makes me feel the way you make me feel, you know? And it's like,
you know, so that's a very challenging experience for anyone in that position. And so,
uh, the advice I would give him is to like, you know, prior way, if he's in a relationship to
prioritize that relationship above all else and, and try to attack your relationship as a team
rather than two individuals, uh, it's easier said than done, um, because they're very much getting
to know one another. Um, and so, um, and so, and so, and so, and so, and so, and so, and so, and so,
and and more like to know one another and you don't fall in love, uh, with the actual
person you fall in love with whatever, whatever version that you got to see while they were in
a very untraditional and, and structured and staged environment that is meant to elicit
the maximum amount of emotion. So like the connections are real because, uh, of the
environment that they're in, but you don't know if the feelings that you're feeling are,
are morebay for you. I mean, I, I don't know if you can, I don't know if you can, I don't know
if you can, I don't know if you can reach them or if you can almost reach them, if you
manufactured rather than genuine and no one really knows that until they get out in the real world
well it's a manufactured environment like the feelings are real but none of us regular people
are ever going to be in that situation there are situations where if you're single you're maybe
dating multiple people at once but no one else is seeing any of those dates either so having to
watch it back i've never once saw myself on a date having to watch it back on tv i mean i i've said
this before too but you know when i was going through it my first time you know on the bachelorette
i remember having the thought of like i know i like her and i know i really like her but i also
know i'm really competitive and i what i don't know is i i can't honestly answer which is playing
a bigger role into my feelings the authenticity of my feelings like she was someone like i would
have you know naturally been attracted to and i didn't know like i like i could be self-aware
i'm a competitive guy like how much is that playing a role but you you can't answer that
question until you're out of the bubble right and so you kind of have to take a leap of faith
and just say well like we'll see and then there's almost more pressure when you're out
because everybody's seeing this fairy tale come to life and then if it doesn't work out exactly how
the world it's just like oh you didn't try right it wasn't authentic you did it for the fame yeah
you're the villain it can be definitely a challenge and it's it's not
deal way for anyone to start a relationship as hard as filming the show is uh having the show
being aired if you're in a relationship is is even harder yeah so one thing that you have really
settled into and really owned which i am in awe of because i'm terrible at it is being vulnerable
with your personal life and now congrats you just got engaged oh thank you um in a health as what it
seems in a healthy happy relationship and you're very
open about it and you share all these things via your podcast and different social media platforms
but how are you able to kind of keep that balance of like keeping your mental health
and the health of your relationship with also being in the spotlight weirdly enough i still
kind of consider myself a private person like i'm i'm not trying to share everything about my life
for our relationship but um
you know it's i give a lot of relationship advice on my show i try especially not this
point in my life i try to incorporate my own advice into my own life easier said than done
sometimes um but especially when i notice we are you know natalie and i when we do things that work
or um where we might face a challenge and we can overcome it uh it's nice to be able to share that
with my audience it's like uh hey we this experience this experience is going to be a
this was a challenge um and this is how we got through it you might you know maybe you guys
can try to incorporate that and so that's just kind of the mental process i kind of think about
when i'm you know willing to put something out there um and then i also it's just a big thing
for me to not read my own press you know or read comments or google myself or read articles or go
on reddit you know it's just it's none of my business you know be a dark rabbit hole uh and
so i protect my mouth
mental health by you know setting some boundaries with myself about not doing that you know no one's
perfect and i've done i've gone down rabbit holes and i've made the mistakes certainly in the past
but uh it's something i put a lot of effort into to not do because it's there's no positive outcome
to uh getting feedback from a stranger compliments are dangerous because they're easy to want to
believe and you know so when you read a lot of like you're amazing you're great that's wonderful
whatever compliment
it's easy to go yeah thank you oh great yeah but subconsciously if you're gonna believe that
then you have to believe the criticism because you just spent the past few seconds like
validating strangers feedback and so you have to believe the negative if you're willing to
believe the positive so it's well it only takes one negative too to like bring you all the way
down but that's but that's because you spent all this time saying that these these stranger these
strangers feedback are
truthful these are right like your subconscious is forced to believe the negative you can't just
brush it off you can't say oh well they don't know me because you spent all this time being like i am
oh they do know me they do know me i am great so this is a very dangerous game uh to to read your
own uh press so to speak with you and natalie you talked about that you you feel like you're still
kind of private and there are some things that you keep private was that a discussion that you guys
had to protect your relationship yeah we talk a lot about it i mean it was something that i've been
i have a relationship with dating podcast and so you know i we communicate everything i mean just
you know we recently got engaged and just last night we were we were talking about like what
are we comfortable with us sharing having a relationship with dating podcasts it's not so
much what the outcome is it's like the process like how did you guys communicate and what was
your style to get to whatever your answer was or your decision right so you know we talked about
you know we're open to sharing that and we might not be open to sharing what our decision was
uh at least right away so then that keeps a level of privacy uh without um without you know holding
too much back and sharing with people like how they were able to work through some tough
conversations or or big conversations that's you know can often lead to disagreements or you know
being not on the same page and and how we work through that is is something we you know we're
willing to share it's weird right because you know we're willing to share it's weird because we're
willing to share it's weird because this new age it is a conversation that you do have to have with
your partner at some point if you have any sort of social media presence yeah it's i mean even me
like having over a million followers it's hard for me to be open about my personal life and that
even goes to friends and family i'm so hesitant about posting them or sharing about it because i
because i know how people come at me and maybe i need to take a note from your book and like not
read comments i just yeah
it would hurt worse if it comes for those people you know what i mean and my boyfriend as well
being somewhat of a public figure you know there are are things with his job and he's an athlete
and people are always wondering like if he's training if he's coming back what our dynamic
is because we are both basketball players this and that and there are some things that people
ask like where is he what's he doing that's not my business to share yeah you know what i mean
but it's something obviously i we i know exactly what's going on yeah it's
tough yeah i think like with anything in relationship you just have to communicate
boundaries and then you have to respect each other's boundaries and figure out what you're
both comfortable with and you just also have to figure out what's the priority you know like
my two biggest priorities in my life right now are are my career and my relationship and i would
say in the reverse order you know it's my relationship comes first yeah that's the
priority and so i gotta figure out all right like it might be better for my show to like just
everything but as much as my show's a priority the relationship's a bigger priority so i have
to find ways to incorporate our relationship on my show that fits with the boundaries we set for
our relationship because that's the higher priority speaking of athlete and celebrity
relationships is there any advice that you would give to people who are in the spotlight you got
to know where you stand in your relationship you got to know where you rank on on each other's
priority list because that can play a big role and if if you're lucky enough to be in a relationship
you have to feel like uh you're your person's number one priority above all things and all
decisions that relate to their life like career or you know personal life um kind of like the
barometer is the relationship that gives you an immense amount of trust you have to like
every so often check in with yourself about your relationship and feel like yeah i feel like it's
pretty equitable like i've made sacrifices she's made sacrifices vice versa
and like we feel like we're both there to support again us and like i don't think there's enough of
conversations that happen on that level and i think oftentimes relationship there's usually
one person feeling like they're doing more of the work or they're making the sacrifices and
the other person just doesn't see the commitment or the prioritization that they're putting into it
there's going to be times too where it's it's 70 30 or it's 20 80 at different times during
your relationship
depending on what's going on totally that individual's life i think it's interesting
with athletes as well because their career ends very young sure for most like nba is
30s like lebron's playing until almost 40 now but that's unheard of in a way your average career is
three three years right and then you have the rest of your life you know with this relationship
with this person and then it's almost like you know i was a former athlete you were as well i
did some research into that like finding your
new identity after this career that really took your whole life and i i wonder how that plays into
relationships as well i'm not the relationship guru that's why we have you on but uh i imagine
it can be a struggle like i think you hear a lot of stories of professional athletes who
especially ones that had a great career or a long career and and then they retire and you
you hear about like kind of an identity crisis that they can face you know
i can only imagine that you know i'm not the relationship guru i'm not the relationship guru
you know uh the closest i can come to that is like you know being the bachelor and then you know
you're for like six months you're treated like you're treated like like an a-list celebrity
you're not actually an a-list celebrity but you're getting that type of access for a period of time
and that's that quickly slows down and then that you know but imagine being an athlete who
experiences that access for a period of time and that kind of attention and that identity
and i think if you don't really feel confident secure with who you are you're not going to be
or if you don't have a purpose an individual purpose i think that can play a significant role
and cause a ton of stress on a relationship because like a relationship i don't feel like
it can give you purpose you know on a certain level i think you have to have your own identity
and a relationship kind of rounds yeah that out nick here on courtside club we like to take a
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we have all-star quickly approaching so i would like you have are you familiar with the new
all-star setup in the nba yeah uh where they do like draft they draft their own teams yeah so
basically yeah so i want you to be the captain of your all-star team but we are choosing from
bachelor nation and it can be current past but like what game are we trying to win
are we playing basketball no you don't they don't have to be athletic this is just your all-star cast
for like most compelling season yeah let's do it sure most compelling most viewership so i need
your starting five your coach and your sixth man you can also coach if you want i'll be the coach
since you know i have i've i've there's nothing on that show i haven't done so i could probably
give a personal anecdote to my my players so to speak um let's see i'd put hannah brown in there
it's a big player
she's a star she's running point uh caitlyn bristow as well probably um for the guys but we but we
need also kind of like that dennis rodman on the team that little that little fire probably should
put tyler cameron in there just because okay people would be disappointed if he's not in in
there um maybe i'd be a player's coach you're gonna be a player coach okay we're putting you
in the starting lineup too i'll put ashley and jared in there as well so wait one's coming in
off the bench because now we have six i'll have jared come off the bench jared's coming off the
bench so our starting five hannah hannah at the one caitlyn at the two tyler tyler at the three
you at the four sure and then ashley you're pretty tall and then ashley's our center
she's very versatile she's like a magic johnson you know she's a point and place
play one through five all right it's time for the second half speaking on reality tv shows
another reality show that you could see yourself on obviously not dating we have that covered
not as a contestant yeah no like dancing with the stars well i've already did i've done dancing with
the stars you did yeah how did i miss that one how did you do on dancing with the stars uh
top five or six okay me nancy kerrigan and i went home the same same week oh wow so i had
rashad jennings on that i was on his season okay you were
he won yeah right okay yeah cool i had a really great time i wish i could do it again only for
the purpose i wish i would have had more fun you know i really wanted to do well and i because
you're competitive i'm yeah well yeah and i like to dance too but i got real nervous i psyched
myself out rather than just like i you know it's very technical ballroom dancing um it's not like
going to a wedding and just being goofy you know yeah so it's like remembering your steps and
um i would i wish i would have cared less about screwing up and and had more fun and i think i
would have subsequently performed better so you grew up playing sports track yeah i played every
sport but track and baseball were my my two best and you won state for track in high school yeah
that's pretty sick thanks like not a lot of people say they have a state ring that's all i ever wanted
in basketball and we always had a good enough team to get there and it was just we were one of those
teams that would earn a lot of money and we were one of those teams that would earn a lot of money
underestimate bad teams that we should have beat it has always happened in playoffs and that's like
one thing me at 32 years old still regrets not having a state ring so i saw that i was like
that's pretty fire yeah i mean lucky enough for track um you know i didn't have to rely on my
teammates i mean i won i won i won it as an individual and i we i won one as a member of
a relay team so okay there's teammates there but what was your relay you did individual was 800
or is that four okay and then four by four we won as well that's sick yeah so then in college
you eight and four i was better at the eight you know it's like one of those things in college
i was a pretty fast sprinter but in college you kind of like you kind of move up a class
oh for sure yeah it's basically run that fast but just do it twice as long i ran the four the eight
and the 16 and i was best at the eight and the 16 they say the 400 is the basketball players race
but i was too slow for that because it is a sprint but it's like a long sprint you know
yeah yeah so 800 in college is a sprint too yeah yeah for sure that's next level but that's what
you're talking about it's a sprint with like more endurance than a lot yeah you grew up in milwaukee
yeah suburbs of milwaukee are you a bucks fan i am okay how are you feeling you guys you guys
won the chip was it two years ago i feel like uh
superstar and yannis it feels like they're you know they honestly should be better record should
be a little bit better they seem like they're doing the same thing they did last year which
is like they're teetering at the top of the division but they like well before they won
the championship game they were kind of like the regular season heroes were like right you know
they were they weren't losing many games they were just crushing everyone and then they wouldn't
perform in the playoffs uh and then they did when they won the championship but like last year it's
like you know it's 82 games i don't know there's like you
players but it just seems like they're they're coasting right now they're coasting a little bit
and it's definitely that time of year i feel like after all-star like a few weeks after all-star
they start ramping up again the guys do whether they're doing it subconsciously or not because
then they know okay we got to get a seed what seed do we want yeah now we have to turn it on
yeah and it's tough well you know last year they lost chris middleton in the playoffs and i think
they beat boston pretty easily if he's not hurt you know um they took him out of the playoffs
seven games without chris middleton they really lost a lot by losing his defense more than
anything um but um yeah we'll see i mean i think they're as good as any team right but i think it's
cool for the nba because before they won that chip it was a lot of these super teams and big cities
yeah and so i was i actually loved seeing that because i was like this is how you can still do
it like we all as fans i don't think we all want to see all the superstars on the court
on the same teams i agree and in the finals it's the same teams over and over we don't we don't
want that yeah like there's not a lot of like you know premier players like saying let's go to
milwaukee and win a championship right but yeah it seems like the milwaukee the current milwaukee
bucks are like this generations of like the san antonio spurs with tim duncan and mano genoble and
and um that that team where it's just like they clearly have a lot of good players but
they're homegrown
and they're they're not they're not you know it wasn't like san antonio spurs they just signed
you know someone to come in and win a championship game they won several championships championships
with their original roster and i yeah i think it's good for the league and it seems like the
bucks are that team right now hopefully they can win more than one with janice um and i think most
milwaukee fans there feel pretty pretty fortunate his just his mindset there's just not a lot of
players like janice who you know
would have re-upped in milwaukee right i would have had that loyalty to the city and um it's been
great i mean i truly never thought i'd see the bucks win a championship game in my lifetime
just i didn't think the economy of the nba allowed for a market like that to compete but they got a
little lucky with drafting a player like him who was as good as him and and had the mentality to
want to to build something in a small market city and it's it's i think been not only great for a
sports band sports fans fans it's been great for the city huge package of fans and fans and fans
very much yeah i saw on your twitter it's like relationship kind of your um the clips from
your show this and that and then ranting about the packers yeah yeah i feel like it's emotional
roller coaster yeah i definitely i i i i i'm aware that i kind of throw mild temper tantrums
on twitter when it relates to the green bay packers you know it's i'm like you're seeing
me tweet my feelings in real time while watching the game yeah you know and it's what you're
supposed to do yeah you know it's just like you know it's like i love you but oh you suck uh yeah
like i love you but you guys choked did you like the rogers love the rogers era i mean listen like
he is in the hall of fame quarterback and i'm very grateful it's like but it's time to move
on i think yeah it's time to move on i you know um he's an interesting character i don't know him
personally but like
my personality might be you know have some similarities to his more so than like a tom
right not that i'm trying to compare myself but like for the criticisms that aaron rogers gets
yeah you know about kind of how he can rub people the wrong way like sometimes i'm like i can see
myself in that where he can be aloof and a critical thinker and he can kind of he's willing to speak
out on things that that might be outside of football which you know not everyone likes when
when their athletes speak on topics
that kind of bleed outside the sport but i find them to be really interesting and as a as a player
and as a fan it's it's been incredible like if you have a quarterback uh that's good you you go
into every season at least thinking you're competing for a championship whether you do or
not it's definitely a bummer he only won or has been to one definitely some of that is his fault
uh some of that is uh the front office some of that is just they've had some tough injury luck
at the wrong like the front office and they've had some tough injury luck at the wrong like the
wrong times but i'm as a fan i'm ready to move on i think they drafted jordan love for a reason
yeah and if they're gonna invest a first round draft pick and jordan love and three years of
having him on the roster and coaching him up it's time to start putting their money where their mouth
is and and see what jordan can do and hopefully replicate the same type of success they had
when they moved on to aaron rogers from brett farve is right is that so we'll see
one quick note did you know that it's a thousand
year wait list for season tickets for the packers yeah i don't know it's a thousand but i know it's
long last time i heard it was like 30 years or something like that maybe it's a thousand i don't
know insanity yeah so if you've ever been to green bay no i haven't it's it's it is it's the
you guys go hard there yeah it's an identity for the people of wisconsin and it's you know team
city owned and that's it's great it's an experience and um yeah
whatever yeah concept
but it's it's cool to be a packer fan you know
before i let you go i have some buzzer readers for you shoot
describe your ideal food and drink combo while sitting courtside while sitting courtside a good
hotdog in a beer okay but it has to be a good there's a lot of hot dogs out there are there good
ones in washington actually yeah i could see that being like a good hot dog state i think dodger dogs or dogű exhaust
hotdog pace would be great if we had a good hot dog we would be winning the hot dog race after that
never had one they're not good i mean hot dog you can have you know it's a wild card yeah it's in
the hot dog but uh there's some good hot dogs out there um the brewers in the wisconsin we're known
for our sausages so we we take pride in in those sausages but uh yeah i was kidding i love a good
hot dog and uh and a beer i guess cool if i'm courtside who was one person dead or alive that
you would love to sit courtside with dan or alive jack nicholson he seems like he's like a
courtside legend yes and he also just seems he's a legend actor he's i've i've i know people who've
had the pleasure of knowing him so i've heard some really cool stories about him and that must
be just a fascinating watch and what is one event in history it could be a sporting event or other
that you would have loved to have been courtside for uh bulls versus the jazz
uh the yeah that the shot the shot yeah that would i was a massive jordan fan as a kid um
yeah the crossover yeah i would have loved to have been there have you met him no not yet that's
that's someone on my list too oh yeah i bet you michael jordan has seen you on the bachelor
yeah probably a lot of people surprisingly watch it i think you know like i think when obama was
president he made jokes referencing the bachelor and you know he's got two daughters
it wouldn't shock me if you know it's amazing the people who who watch that show um it's and
it's very surreal when certain people um you find out know who you are or just know that you exist
is an interesting thing yeah well mike thank you so much for coming on the courtside club i know
you're a busy guy but let everybody know where they can follow you and anything that they should
be on the lookout for thanks for having me it's been a ton of fun um i guess more than anything
if you're a podcast listener my show the
outfiles is uh you can listen to wherever you listen to podcasts we also put our episodes out
on youtube if you're more of a visual person we're a relationship and dating podcast that also talks
a lot about pop culture and so we kind of intersect um you know pop culture conversations with like
real life relationship situations and uh we do three shows a week and we have people call in and
share their stories and i offer advice we also uh every week have you know public figures and guests
come on and you know talk about either their lives or you know specific experience or just
you know we'll rift about pop culture and if you are a reality tv fan we will recap various
reality tv shows as well so a little something for everyone but uh yeah that's you guys do a
great job new studio too new studio yeah we just moved to a new studio and um it's been a lot of
fun and we're growing and and uh trying to just grow even more so it's it's been a lot of fun and
pretty cool cool well guys we'll see you next week bye bye
make sure that you check that out also make sure to like and subscribe and we will see you next week